Audience Of One
by ThePossibilityOfMagic
Summary: Sometimes, things are not as they seem to be.  And other times, that's exactly what they are.


_So, I seriously **swore** to myself that I would not jump on the 'Knockdown Bandwagon' and write a version of the Knockdown kiss (after the episode aired and we knew exactly what happened, I mean). But I was thinking about it last night and I really think that one key player in the kiss has been underappreciated and, as far as I know, pretty much ignored. If anyone has already gone down this road, I really do apologize for doubling up. _

_A second note- some of you may have noticed some words or spellings in my writing that are not really used in the US vernacular. I'm Australian but my writing is heavily influenced by the American dialect, so you'll probably see a bit of a mix of both. Just thought I'd mention it._

_Another, mostly irrelevant note- you know I never realized I was a fluff writer? You would think I would have noticed that when very few other genres ever arose in my writing lol. But I was pretty much oblivious until fairly recently. Ah well, I guess you have to embrace who you are, so this is me, embracing me._

_Anyway, back to the story- I'm not sure if we were ever given a name for this guy (he probably appears in the credits as "Lockwood's Henchman #3" or something) so I named him. And, just like when you name a stray animal, you start getting attached to it. So, I really do hope you enjoy this little oneshot._

_I'll leave you to it now, shall I?_

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Reggie Maguire liked what he did. Sure, it was a little to the left of that big white line called "The Law", but really, he didn't give a crap about that. He'd learned pretty early in life that his talents lay outside the limits of the legal world, and plus, the pay was damn good.

But, like with any job, there were times when he didn't enjoy it so much.

Like tonight.

Just his luck, he'd drawn the goddamn short straw, so instead of getting to have some fun with their newly-acquired detective friends, he'd been sent outside to freeze his ass off playing watchdog.

Stamping his feet to try and get some warmth into his toes, he scowled bitterly, knowing that there was almost no point whatsoever in him being stuck out here. They were professionals; they'd taken the cops without a hitch, even making sure to leave the cell phones behind so they couldn't be traced.

They'd covered all their bases carefully so there was no goddamn way anyone could possibly know where they'd taken their captives, but, thanks to Lockwood's paranoia and overactive sense of imagination, he was probably going to have to stay out here in the cold all freaking night anyway.

And for what? He knew already what the two dumbass detectives would soon realise, once Lockwood had spent some time on them. The cavalry was not coming.

There was no one left to save them.

Just as he had that thought, he heard a couple of car doors close some distance away, off to his left. Immediately on alert, he flicked his head towards the sound, watching with narrowed eyes as an attractive, rich-looking couple stumbled out of the car and stood together near the bumper, giggling and clinging to each other like little kids.

Descending the steps warily, Reggie kept his eyes on the mystery couple, reaching slowly beneath his jacket for the gun holstered at his hip. When you lived the life he did, you had to be suspicious of everybody, especially if you wanted to survive past the age of thirty. And, innocent-looking or not, these two were no exception to his rule.

Grinning stupidly, they staggered drunkenly in his direction, and he moved closer, his fingers closing around the butt of his gun. He'd already made a quick assessment, and knew he'd drop the woman first. She was a total stunner, but she looked fit, too, like she could take him down with some kind of tae-kwan-do or jujitsu shit if he let her get too close.

The guy didn't look like much of a threat– and he definitely didn't have the look of a cop– but Reggie lived by the belief that to make assumptions was to be careless, and when you were in his line of work, carelessness definitely got you killed. Or, locked in the pen.

Neither of those options were particularly pleasing to Reggie, so he made the decision that if he was going to act, it would have to be fast. One for the girl, one for the guy, then a few extra pops once they were on the ground, just to be safe. Better to have a couple of dead nobodies on your hands than to risk the cops getting too close.

But man, he sure wasn't looking forward to having to clean up _that _mess.

They were still several yards away when they suddenly halted, the girl laughing unsteadily as they abruptly faced each other. The sudden movement made Reggie twitch reflexively, his grip tightening on the gun. He was a split second from pulling it out and taking them both down when all of a sudden the guy wrapped his hand around the back of the girl's neck, his fingers burying in her hair.

Reggie felt his eyebrows lift a little as the guy leaned in and kissed her, not even seeming to care that there was a man standing just yards away, watching their every move.

Needing to be certain, Reggie continued to move toward them, but already he could feel his resolve wavering. His steps began to slow, becoming more hesitant, his grip on the gun loosening just a fraction as he considered the two of them.

The girl pulled back from the kiss briefly, seeming shocked, but whether that was due to the possibility that they were acting undercover– which, he had to admit, was seeming less likely by the second– or simply hesitation because he was so nearby, he couldn't tell.

The guy and girl stared silently at each other for a moment, and Reggie thought she might have flicked the briefest glance in his direction, but it happened so quickly that he couldn't be sure he'd seen it at all.

He didn't even have the chance to take another step before she was suddenly wrapping herself around the guy, the two of them getting into it right there in front of him, looking like they were suddenly glued together at the mouth.

Now Reggie really wasn't so sure what to think. His suspicion that they were cops was now seeming almost ludicrous, considering the zealous scene that was unfolding in front of him.

Still, he took a last few cautious steps toward the drunken lovers, coming almost within arm's reach, feeling almost embarrassed about intruding on what was fast becoming a _very_ enthusiastic face-eating session.

They were pressed close together, their hands roving all over each other, and he had the thought that if they _were _undercover cops, they must have been wanting to get in each other's pants a damn long time, because things were certainly becoming heated. The next moment he heard the woman give a small but incredibly erotic moan– the kind of sound he could only dream of causing a woman to make– and in that moment, Reggie found himself slightly aroused and wholly convinced.

Feeling amused and also a little relieved– killing was such a pain in the ass– he let go of his gun and turned around, shaking his head with a small chuckle. The way those two were going at each other, he might even be about to get his own little porn show right here and now, the two of them starring in a private performance for an audience of one.

_Maybe playing watchdog had its perks after all_, he thought with a grin, before something collided forcefully with his temple and his world suddenly went black.

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_I know that was a quick read (I apologize for my long author's note adding probably at least another 100 words to the count in the summary) but I hope you enjoyed it anyway, and I would absolutely love to hear your views on this one :) And as always, thanks for reading!_


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